Helping Your Teen Regulate Intense Emotions: The TIPP Skill Explained

Counseling & Therapy for Teenagers in Flourtown, PA

If your teen often feels like their emotions are a runaway train, teaching them TIPP can give them the tools they need to get back on track. Let’s dive into what TIPP is, how it works, and how you can encourage your teen to use it.

What is the TIPP Skill?

TIPP stands for:

T: Temperature

I: Intense exercise

P: Paced breathing

P: Progressive muscle relaxation

These skills target the body’s physical response to emotional distress. By focusing on physiological changes, TIPP helps “reset” the nervous system, making it easier for the mind to follow suit.

Breaking Down Each Part of TIPP

T: Temperature

When emotions run high, our bodies often feel the heat—literally. Cooling down the body can help your teen calm their emotional state. The quickest way to do this is by applying something cold to the face, such as an ice pack, a cold washcloth, or even splashing cold water.

Example: Your teen just got into a heated argument with a friend and feels like they’re on the verge of tears. Encourage them to grab an ice pack from the freezer and press it to their forehead for 30 seconds. This sudden drop in temperature activates the “dive reflex,” slowing the heart rate and calming the body.

I: Intense Exercise

Physical movement can burn off excess energy that fuels emotional distress. Intense exercise, even for a short burst, helps the body release endorphins, which can stabilize mood.

Example: Your teen comes home frustrated after getting a bad grade on a test. Suggest they do a quick set of jumping jacks, sprint in place for 60 seconds, or take a fast walk around the block. Even a few minutes of intense activity can shift their emotional state.

P: Paced Breathing

When emotions are overwhelming, breathing becomes shallow and rapid, which can exacerbate anxiety. Paced breathing slows things down, signaling to the brain that it’s time to relax.

How to do it: Teach your teen to breathe in for a count of four, hold the breath for four seconds, and then exhale slowly for a count of six. Repeating this cycle for a minute or two can create a sense of calm.

Example: Your teen is panicking about an upcoming presentation. Sitting with them and practicing paced breathing together not only teaches the skill but shows them that you’re there to support them.

P: Progressive Muscle Relaxation

When emotions spike, the body tenses up, creating a feedback loop of stress. Progressive muscle relaxation involves tensing and relaxing different muscle groups to release built-up tension.

How to do it: Guide your teen to clench their fists tightly for five seconds and then slowly release, paying attention to how their muscles feel as they relax. They can repeat this process with other muscle groups, like their shoulders or legs.

Example: Your teen is lying awake at night, replaying an embarrassing moment from the day. Encourage them to try progressive muscle relaxation, starting with their toes and working their way up to their head, to help them unwind and fall asleep.

Why Does TIPP Work?

TIPP is grounded in the connection between the body and emotions. When your teen’s body feels out of control—rapid heartbeat, sweaty palms, tense muscles—it’s hard for their mind to focus or process rationally. TIPP interrupts this cycle, allowing the body to reset and paving the way for clearer thinking.

How to Teach Your Teen TIPP

1. Practice During Calm Moments: The best time to learn TIPP is when emotions aren’t running high. Pick a quiet moment and walk through each skill together. Practice applying cold, doing a burst of exercise, slowing your breathing, or tensing and relaxing muscles.

2. Use Visual Reminders: Create a simple cheat sheet or visual reminder for your teen to keep in their room, backpack, or phone. This makes it easier for them to remember the steps when they’re upset.

3. Model the Skills Yourself: Show your teen that these skills are useful for anyone—not just teens. If you’re feeling stressed, talk aloud as you use one of the TIPP techniques. For example, you might say, “I’m feeling really anxious right now, so I’m going to take some deep breaths to calm down.”

When to Use TIPP

TIPP is ideal for situations where emotions feel overwhelming and it’s hard to think straight. Some examples include:

• Right before a big test or performance.

• After an argument with a friend or sibling.

• When feeling out of control due to anxiety or sadness.

• During moments of panic or frustration.

By practicing and using these skills, your teen can gain confidence in managing their emotions, making it easier to face challenges with a clear head.

As a parent, your role is to guide and support them in using TIPP. Be patient—it may take time for them to feel comfortable with these techniques. The more they practice, the more natural it will feel, and over time, they’ll develop the resilience they need.