IMPROVE the Moment: How to Make Crisis Moments Bearable

When your teen is in a moment of crisis, they may feel like there is no escape from the intense feelings they are experiencing.

To cope with these feelings, they may lash out or engage in impulsive behaviors that make the situation worse.

While crisis moments are intimidating and frightening, it is important for your teen to know that they aren’t forever.

With the right skills, crisis moments can become more bearable, and your teen won’t feel like they have to act impulsively to deal with their big emotions.

One distress tolerance skill used in dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) that can help teens during these moments is IMPROVE the Moment.

By utilizing this skill, teens can remain calm during moments where their immediate impulse may be to behave impulsively and give in to their overwhelming emotions.

What is IMPROVE the Moment?

As its name suggests, IMPROVE the Moment is a skill that helps teens improve their crisis moments so that these moments are tolerable.

Essentially, this skill allows teens to reduce the intensity of the emotions they are experiencing so that these emotions feel manageable without extreme action.

What are the IMPROVE the Moment strategies?

IMPROVE stands for seven strategies that teens can use to achieve moments of calm and peace, even during crisis moments: imagery, meaning, prayer, relaxation, one thing in the moment, vacation, and encouragement.

Imagery

In movies and television shows, you’ve probably seen people talk about going to their “happy place” when they are upset.

Tell your teen to imagine a situation that feels safe, relaxing, and peaceful when they feel overwhelmed during a crisis moment. Encourage them to enhance their visualization and truly picture themselves being in a different place facing a different situation.

As they start to visualize themselves in a different physical environment with different physical sensations, their body will start to mimic these sensations, and they will feel more relaxed and better able to handle the emotions they are facing.

Meaning

Have your teen consider what is truly most important and meaningful in their life. 

Sometimes when situations seem overwhelming, it can be helpful for your teen to remember that life has meaning beyond what they are currently experiencing, and that their current emotions cannot rob them of their purpose or of the true meaning of life.

Prayer

While prayer is typically associated with religion, it doesn’t have to be a religious practice for your teen to use it in moments of crisis.

Teach your teen to use mindfulness to ground themselves and connect with something greater than themselves.

While this can be a prayer to a spiritual being, it could also be a mantra or even a quote that is meaningful to your teen. 

Verbalizing this prayer, mantra, or quote can remind your teen that life is bigger than the current moment.

Relaxation

Relaxing will help reduce the intensity of your teen’s emotions and help them self-soothe. Have your teen try taking deep breaths, stretching, listening to soothing music, laying down, or completing other activities that promote calmness and relaxation.

One thing in the moment

When your teen’s thoughts feel overwhelming, it can be helpful for them to focus on one thought at a time to help them manage their thoughts and feelings.

Instead of holding on to the past or fearing the future, have your teen fix their mind on one thought or one situation that will bring them comfort and strength while slowing down their thoughts and emotions.

Vacation

No, this doesn’t mean that you need to take your teen on a trip every time they are feeling overwhelmed.

Simply taking a break from their usual schedule to make time for self-care can make a difference.

Maybe this means taking a long, warm bath instead of a quick shower, meeting up with a friend for coffee, or spending time going on a long walk around the neighborhood.

These breaks can provide a “vacation” or bit of relief from the stress of their day, which will help them cope with their negative emotions.

Encouragement

Everyone needs support during hard times. Remind your teen that in addition to the support you offer them, they can also provide encouragement and support for themselves.

Have your teen tell themselves that their negative feelings are only temporary or that they are proud of themselves for the way they are able to handle negative emotions.

This self-encouragement can give your teen the push they need to make it through a tough, emotional situation. 

The more familiar your teen becomes with the IMPROVE the Moment skill, the easier it will be for them to navigate the challenging situations they face in life.