Being a teen isn't easy. With rigorous extracurricular schedules, grueling test prep, competitive college applications, busy social lives, and family responsibilities, it's no wonder teens may need help managing stress. But healthy coping strategies benefit them not only with current stressors, but also in the long term.
Physical activity, tapping into their creativity, and breathwork are just a few healthy ways to cope with stress.
Why It’s Important To Learn To Cope With Stress
Imagine this - your teenager just came home from six hours at school, an hour at (insert sport here) practice, and their SAT prep course. They grumpily roll their eyes at you before they huff up the stairs to start their 4 hours of homework. Though many of their daily activities may spark joy, jam-packed days are bound to become stressful eventually. When the stress does hit, it’s crucial that they have the tools to recognize what they’re feeling and cope with it.
It’s important for teens to learn how to manage stress for emotional regulation, long-term well-being, and better academic success, and it's essential for adulthood. Unmanaged stress can lead to physical ailments like headaches and stomachaches, and mental health issues like anxiety and depression. Some of the first warning signs may show up at home. So, what can you do to help support your teen?
Adopt Healthy Coping Habits
Once you’re aware of your teen's stress triggers, you can start implementing healthy ways to help them cope. Here are some simple, healthy tools for your teen to cope with their big feelings.
If your teen feels stressed about a big feeling or a large task, break it down into smaller, manageable steps. Some feelings, or even school projects, may feel overwhelming. It can be less daunting to break a big feeling (or project) into pieces rather than taking it on the whole thing at once.
Your teen can help release good endorphins and lower the stress hormone, cortisol, through physical exercise, sports, dance, yoga, or walking.
If your teen tends to spiral out when they feel stressed, encourage them to practice emotional regulation through deep breathing, mindfulness, and meditation. These practices help calm the nervous system so your teen can move forward calmly.
When your child starts to overthink a problem, let them tap into their creative side. Whether it’s art, music, or writing, getting a new perspective and entering a flow state is a more suitable headspace for them to process their emotions.
If your teen has been stressed lately, ensure they’re taking care of themself. Make sure they get 8-10 hours of sleep every night, encourage healthy eating habits, and spend quality time in nature. Did you know that spending just 20 minutes in green space can promote relaxation and lower blood pressure?
Frustration tolerance (or intolerance) is a thing. Help your teen shift their mindset during a stressful time, focusing on what they can control rather than seeing everything as a challenge or threat. Positive reframing can break your teen’s habit of negative self-talk, replacing it with a can-do attitude.
Healthy coping doesn’t have to be time-consuming or painful. Incorporating one or two of these practices during stressful times can help your teen overcome challenges and move forward with less friction. Not to mention it creates a solid foundation for coping with stress later in life.
What Unhealthy Coping Skills Look Like
Now that we know more about healthy coping mechanisms, here are some warning signs of unhealthy habits to look out for. Some behaviors may be typical for a teen, but others can be red flags for deeper issues.
Avoidance and/or escapism: Instead of addressing issues or stressors, you notice your teen ignoring problems, excessively gaming, binge-watching TV, or doomscrolling on social media to an extreme amount. While an evening of being a couch potato (AKA rest) is needed from time to time, a drastic increase may not be typical, and is certainly not the healthy way to cope with stress.
Isolation: Is your teen typically a social butterfly but has been ghosting all their friends lately? Though spending more time alone may be normal for a teen, drastically withdrawing from friends and family can be a sign of something more.
Substance use: Not only is drug or alcohol use not a healthy (or legal) way to cope, it’s sure to only perpetuate and worsen their stress and overall health. Drugs and alcohol use in the teen years can potentially lead to a far higher risk of addiction later in life.
Aggression: An irritable teen from time to time may be typical. However, repeatedly and harshly taking their anger out on others or destroying property should be an immediate red flag that something more is happening with their mental health.
Utilizing unhealthy ways to cope with stress isn’t the end of the world. Your child is just trying to figure out what makes them feel better, and may not have the toolkit needed to make the most appropriate choice in that stressful moment. Once you’ve noticed an unhealthy coping mechanism habit starting to form, you can gently intervene and redirect them in a safer direction.
How To Support Your Stressed Out Teen
When teens are feeling stressed, it's important to offer them extra support while they go through it. Your presence and being a shoulder for them to lean on can make a big difference. Being empathetic and compassionate toward their struggles, while validating their feelings, is at the core of helping them.
Find low-pressure moments, like when you’re driving or walking together, for meaningful conversations. Being side-by-side to avoid direct eye contact takes the pressure off. It’s also better to have short, more frequent check-ins rather than one long chat.
Remind your teen that everyone, including adults, needs stress-coping tools on hard days.
Supporting your teen through stressful times can be challenging, but Creative Healing is here to help. Reach out to us for answers to your questions, guidance on your teen’s behavior, and resources for your family’s well-being.
