If your teen has ever wrestled with low self image or an eating disorder, you know just how painful it can be to see them feeling shame about themselves and their bodies. As a parent, all you want is for your teen to be healthy and to feel comfortable in their own skin.
That’s why it can be refreshing to see recent trends toward body positivity.
However, while the body positive movement that is sweeping the nation might seem to be a step in the right direction, it can actually be harmful for teens.
This is because the body positivity movement highlights the physical appearance of the body. Although being told to celebrate your body regardless of how it looks might sound like an healthy idea, it still emphasizes looks.
This can be triggering for teens with a history of body image issues or disordered eating.
Instead of finding value for who they are and who they are becoming, teens receive the message that their self-worth and value comes from their physical appearance.
So while this movement is well intentioned, it is not the solution to body image issues your teen may be facing.
If you want to see your teen make real progress in this area of their life, it is far more helpful to focus on body neutrality rather than body positivity.
Whereas body positivity aims to help teens feel good about how their bodies look, body neutrality helps them feel good about what their body does.
Our bodies do so much for us, and it is important for your teen to recognize the value of their body beyond its appearance.
Their body allows them to participate in extracurricular activities like sports. It allows them to receive hugs and physical affection. It allows them to move around and go places where they want to go. It allows them to breathe and stay alive.
When teens are able to recognize and appreciate all of the many tasks their bodies are able to do, it will help them learn to treat their bodies with respect and reverence, which can help them combat negative thinking patterns and habits surrounding their bodies and the food they eat.
You can help your teen practice body neutrality instead of body positivity in a few ways:
Acknowledge your teen’s strengths
When your teen is praised for who they are rather than what they look like, it will help them move away from centering their thoughts on their body.
Instead of telling them that their body is looking more or less muscular or complimenting them for losing weight, give them compliments about their personality and their actions.
If they play a sport, recognize them for their strength, speed, or mental fortitude during a meet or a game rather than saying that their weight or physical appearance contributes to their success.
When your teen knows that they have worth outside of their looks, it will help them focus more on factors outside of their appearance.
Encourage them to keep a gratitude journal
Nothing will help your teen become more comfortable with their body and grateful for what their body can accomplish faster than keeping a gratitude journal.
They can start with simple statements like I’m grateful for my body because it allows me to play basketball or I’m grateful that my body gives me energy to babysit for the neighbors or I’m grateful for my body that gives me the opportunity to go on long walks with Grandma.
When your teen is intentional with taking time to note what their body is capable of accomplishing, they will have a greater appreciation for their body.
Help them focus on their wellbeing
Receiving proper nutrition, adequate sleep, and daily exercise is far more important for your teen’s health than their weight or the appearance of their body.
Instead of connecting their weight to their health, focus on these other factors that have a bigger impact on their overall wellbeing.
If your teen isn’t getting at least seven hours of sleep each night, daily movement, and a balanced diet, it will negatively impact their body’s performance. It is vital for your teen to recognize how these factors affect their health so they can prioritize their physical wellbeing over the way their body looks.
When you help your teen practice body neutrality rather than body positivity, you will start to notice this shift making a positive impact on their physical, mental, and emotional health.